You Saved?
What seemed like ages ago, I was a classroom teacher. I taught middle school mathematics. It was an awesome time in my life because I loved teaching, and I loved my students—many still call me today. Thinking back, I recall the many mistakes that I made. Though I was saved, I was not living a spirit-filled life. I will still largely driven by emotion. As a result, I said and did some things that were not pleasing to God. As I reflect now, my conduct was often on opposite ends of the spectrum. For instance, I could go from being thoughtful and prayerful to moody, temperamental, and even out of control.
One day I was encouraging my students to always be prayerful. I shared with them that God was faithful and would never leave them. They could always call on Him. Suddenly, one of my students loudly blurted out, “You saved?” in an incredulous manner. I was taken aback. His question haunted me for days. It made me realize that I was not being “light” (Matthew 5:16). Those impressionable young people did not see God in me. It was a horrifying realization, and it took me to my knees. I began to ask God to change me from the inside out.
It was through prayer and study that I understood that I could not change myself, God had to change me. God also revealed to me that I had been making excuses and blaming others for my issues. I had to own my behavior, repent, and be Godly sorrowful. Then, I needed to humble myself and ask the Holy Spirit for help in turning my character around. I also realized that I had no peace. I was pretending. I was pretending to have love, joy, peace, and the other fruits of the spirit (Galatians 5:22). Every day was a struggle. I decided I wanted true love, joy, and peace. So, I went to work on myself. I agreed with God about my sin, and I asked for help. Today, some 20+ years later, I can honestly say I have love, joy, peace, and other fruits of the spirit. Still, I am a work in progress, but I am truly happier. I have so much appreciation and love for God and that inquisitive student, whose question led me on a spiritual journey.
Friends, you can have peace. God promised it, Jesus died for it, and the Holy Spirit is waiting to help you. Don’t live your life pretending. Seek God! Every good and perfect gift comes from Him (James 1:17). Just ask Him for it and be willing to do whatever it takes to get to that sweet place in Him.
For God’s Glory,
Tahnee
